Lower Your Shield

By Mary Cameron

Mary Cameron is the chair of Habitat for Humanity International, chair of a private lumber company and sits on two other boards. She has served on over 40 public, private, crown and not-for-profit boards. She’s also a former CEO of three different private companies and a former deputy minister.

A Lesson in Being a Great Director

Several years ago I learned a valuable lesson on how to be a great director. I was talking with Cadmus Delorme, who at the time was Chief of the Cowessess Nation. He shared with me a big challenge he faced. He was having tough conversations both inside and outside of boardrooms about the relations with Indigenous peoples in many businesses in Canada. He described the acrimony, the fear, and often the huge gap of understanding. I asked him how he handled this when the conversations were so personal. He said ‘ I have to lower my shield’.

That image has stayed with me.

Showing Vulnerability

When we are faced with anger, lack of understanding, and apparently irreconcilable views, often the first best move we can make is to show some vulnerability. Raising our shield escalates the interaction. In a conversation when we are getting ready with our verbal volley, our ability to listen and process a new view is severely compromised. Lowering our shield signals we are not escalating the attack. Active listening is lowering our shield.

Confidence vs. Understanding

As directors, we often want to show confidence and deep knowledge. We want to show that we have a clear point of view, and indeed a well formed position that we can describe and defend. However, if the goal is to seek deep understanding before making decisions, it is better to invite new ideas and perspectives. The best boards I have been on spend time understanding the subject, seeking new information and looking at different options. They take a scientific approach, examining all parts of the challenge. Less effective boards develop positions early in the discussion and seek to defend and promote their position. This doesn't lead to better understanding. It seldom leads to creative new ideas and solutions, and certainly does not build alignment. 

The Power of Lowering the Shield

The idea of dropping the shield is powerful. Instead of defending a position, showing imperfection can be surprisingly effective. Saying “I am not sure” or “I don’t have the answer” leaves room for other points of view. This first move of vulnerability changes the atmosphere. It also gives an example and the permission for others to admit they don’t know everything. My observation is when teams (in this case board directors) learn together they start to build trust. And if trust is present in the boardroom discussions can be direct and gritty. With trust, differences of opinion are just that – differences, not personal judgments. 

So the discovery journey can be shared. 

Building Trust

In our last newsletter, we described our board performance model. We talked about how a board should be contributing hindsight, oversight, foresight, and insight (HOFI). Hindsight and oversight ensure compliance and good execution. These conversations and activities typically cast backwards and review past performance for accuracy and lessons learned. The boards that also offer foresight and insight spend time having conversations about the future: strategy, risk, and opportunities. These are all unknowns. So the best of these conversations explore many options and ideas, even if they are difficult. This is where gritty, wide ranging conversations analyzing different scenarios are valuable.

Trust makes these discussions possible. When everyone knows they are working towards a common purpose and no one has all the answers, there is a greater likelihood that everyone will contribute ideas. This all can start with the vulnerable admission ‘I dont have the answer’. 

Changing the Atmosphere

I have seen a chair or a lead director start a conversation by lowering their shield. It is remarkable how this can change the atmosphere! Sometimes, there are very different and strong positions between management and the board, or between directors.  If people try to win by restating and arguing their positions, the discussion can become deeply divided. In the end, there will be a resolution, but the losing side will feel defeated. This is always a poor board outcome. However, when the chair sets the tone to explore and understand, rather than to win, the outcome can be a commitment to a quality decision and good execution.

A Real Life Example

On one board I was on we had a split vote on an important project. After an entire meeting we had not resolved the conflict. The chair asked each director to speak in favor of the opposing position. We called the vote, and the chair had to break the tie. After the decision, we went around the room and heard from every director. There was unanimous support for the decision, even those who had voted against it. Each director felt ‘heard’ and felt they understood the pros and cons. The board was as aligned around that decision as if it had been unanimous. The key was the opportunity to be heard. 

Conclusion

Creating trust in the room and leaving room for disagreement without judgment builds cohesion. Now when I sense conflict in a boardroom, I think of Cadmus. Should I lower my shield, show vulnerability, and seek to find understanding?

Do you want to learn more about being a high-performing director? Explore our High-Performing Board program.